Solitude and Sorrow
by Tindersticks
Summary: Some people build walls not to keep others out, but to see who will care enough to break them. People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges. Sakuno used to build several bridges, but they were trampled over and broken. This is her story.
1. Prologue

**I know. I have to stop making fanfics before it gets out of hand. Because I never finish them. /Cries But I got this wonderful idea, inspired by a quote!**

**Disclaimer: Prince of Tennis, mine? In my dreams. TT I do not own it. **

**Question! What do you want the main pairing to be here? :D **

People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges. Some people build walls not to keep others out, but to see who will care enough to break them.

No person can truly understand this unless they are the subject of it.

Ryuuzaki Sakuno is one girl who understands it.

She was once a cheerful, carefree and fun-loving child.

However, to explain what happened to her that made her become this way…

"Love is when you shed a tear and still want him, it's when he ignores you and you still love him, it's when he loves another girl but you still smile and say I'm happy for you, when all you really want to do is cry."

She once read this in a book, and found it to be quite puzzling.

If you love someone, wouldn't you rather chase after him? If you love someone, why don't you try harder to prove that you would be worthy of his love? If you love someone, why would you let him love another girl?

She had a crush that ran for four years straight.

Her love was directed towards a certain Prince.

Her loves was innocent, pure, untainted.

But when she realized what had been going on behind her back…

She couldn't stand it.

So she left, hoping to find a better opportunity for her life.

Leaving meant she had to leave her friends behind.

She didn't mind it. Why?

It was her best friend who had caused her heart to be enveloped by a black hole, perhaps never showing its pure self ever again.

And the fact it was because of her best friend…

That the impact left on her was too great.

She really did love him.

But apparently, he didn't love her back.

She knows that it's normal. There are many people who had their hearts break in a crueler way.

In the midst of a normal school day, pretending nothing happened, she snuck out.

She pleaded her grandmother to let her enter another school.

She begged and sobbed and went on her knees.

It was a painful sight for the loving elderly woman.

In the end, she was allowed to leave and transfer to Hyoutei. She shall live on her own, having to fend herself of the cruelties and dangers of the world.

And thus begins the story of Ryuuzaki Sakuno, a girl forever changed.


	2. Damaged Heart

**Uhuhuhuhu. Here's the first chapter after the prologue! ^^**

**All disclaimers are in the prologue chappie~ **

**Enjoy! **

Sakuno smiled sweetly as she watched her beloved Prince eat the bento she had made for him. He, in turn, was intently watching the Freshmen Trio practice their swings in the tennis court. Sumire had allowed him to take a break from practice just for Sakuno, something she had really appreciated.

"A-ano, Ryoma-kun, h-how do y-you like it?" She asked nervously, fiddling with her thumbs as she awaited his answer.

He was silent for a few seconds.

"Mada mada dane." He coolly replied, taking another bite out of the onigiri.

The first damage that had been done to her heart had taken place.

She blinked, feeling tears pricking behind her eyes.

'_Baka, baka, baka! Baka Sakuno! You should've known your cooking wasn't very good. You should've improved before making lunch for Ryoma-kun.'_ She mentally berated herself, silently standing up.

She bowed then quickly flew down the stairs, since they had been eating on the roof, covering her flushed face with her hands. Her footsteps made a quick and sharp _tap tap tap _sound.

**/Line break/**

Sakuno looked at her shoes nervously, the breeze causing a slight fluttering movement of her lush, silky chocolate hair. This time, it had been let down for a change.

Ryoma strode beside her, nonchalantly sipping on his Ponta while his trademark cap was nestled upon his head and his hands jammed into his pockets.

He had been told – no, _ordered – _to take her to the racquet shop to fix her racquet's strings. While there, the owner had playfully teased them about being a sweet little couple helping each other out. They had returned and were currently walking on a bridge.

"R-Ryoma-kun, the weather is nice today, isn't it? The sky is really blue and clear. I let go of my braids just for today because I felt it was special. Do you like it? I feel kind of embarrassed since it was my first time, but there's a first time for everything." She tried to start a conversation, blabbering whatever came to her mind.

"Ne…" Ryoma stopped, and looked at her.

Her face turned beet red and she squeaked, "H-hai?"

"You're talking a lot today." He mused, taking another sip.

Sakuno froze for a few seconds, just staring at him before she felt her entire body heat up with embarrassment. Tears started to prick in her eyes.

"A-ah, gomenesai…" She apologized, turning from him and running away.

"Ryu – " Ryoma called out, but she was already out of hearing range and her small figure was rapidly decreasing in size.

The second damage to her heart was done.

**/Line break/**

A few years had gone by since their freshmen year but her feelings towards him stayed the same. Sakuno continued to admire him from afar as he grew up and became much more handsome. His tennis abilities had already exceeded Tezuka's and he was still improving, not yet able to defeat his father.

That one particular day, she had stayed later to help clean the classroom. When she was done, she had started to walk home but heard a familiar voice.

"Ryuuzaki? I have no feelings for her. Please, just give me a chance, _Tomoka." _He pleaded.

Her blood ran cold and she dropped the books she held in her hands. There he was, holding her best friend's hand and practically _begging. _

That was it. Her innocent little heart had completely shattered.

Apparently, they hadn't heard her but continued what they had been doing.

"R-Ryoma-sama…" Tomoka bit her lip, shying her eyes away. She had seen Sakuno, but didn't acknowledge her presence.

"Please, Tomoka. I love you. I. Don't. Love. Ryuuzaki."

What was she?

Some toy he could play with?

A stray dog on the streets he could just kick away?

The dirt in the gardens that everybody just stepped on and paid no mind to?

"I-I'm sorry for intruding." Sakuno whispered, the tears freely streaming down her flushed cheeks. She stiffly bent over to pick up the books she had dropped.

Without another thought, she ran away, heart pounding. She didn't hear Tomoka's response.

"… Fine."

She didn't see the kiss they shared.

She didn't see anything.

What she saw was the bright future ahead of her being trampled on and ruined.

**/Line break/**

The next day, Sakuno went to school with a smile on her face. She greeted everyone she passed by, bowing respectfully.

Tomoka didn't know how to react when she cheerfully started a conversation with her.

Should she be regretful?

Casual?

Sympathetic?

"Tomo-chan, take care of yourself, okay? Be sure he'll make you happy."

"Mm. Sakuno-chan, you too." She replied, still carefully lulling over her thoughts.

When Ryoma came into the classroom, he immediately sat next to Tomoka and pecked her on the cheek. She blushed shyly.

Sakuno just giggled, pretending not to feel hurt, pretending as if they were just some cute, lovey-dovey couple.

Ryoma raised an eyebrow, expecting her not to laugh but to burst into tears. He was not oblivious of the crush she had on him, and being a rather fragile girl, he had thought she would break down.

But giggling?

He glanced at Tomoka, who just shrugged.

Lunch break soon came and Sakuno made sure nobody saw her as she went to go meet Sumire. She took a deep breath and snuck out of the cafeteria, excusing herself by saying "Ah, chotto matte, I need to use the restroom for a bit."

Her friends had nodded and continued the conversation, not knowing what she would be doing.

"O-oba-chan?" Sakuno whispered timidly, fiddling with her fingers.

"Yes, my dear?" Sumire smiled at her precious granddaughter tiredly.

"A-ano… That is… C-can I…" She started to mutter, but didn't know how to continue.

"I won't bite, Sakuno, just tell me what it is that you want to tell me."

"A-ah, nandemonai. Sorry for taking your time on such petty matters!" Sakuno couldn't find the courage to tell her grandmother just yet. She bowed several times, and left the room, scolding herself for being cowardly.

'I suppose I can skip school just for today… Right?' Her little braids went flying as she took for the train to one location:

Hyoutei Gakuen.


End file.
